Twas the Night

Twas the Night

Twas the Night before Christmas

and I laid awake
listening for the one sound
for which my heart ached

It wasn't for sleigh bells
or for reindeer hoofbeats
not even the sound of silent snowflakes

It was something much smaller
but far more dear
for which I prayed with inclined ear

It was the sound of an infant's cry
because in that frail noise
was the voice of Adonai

I listened tonight
for the songs of angels
to hear the heavenly light

I listened tonight
for the bleating of lambs
surrounding the most holy Lamb

I listened tonight
for the wisemen's words
as they knelt in worship of the most holy Word

but Alas! I fear
that nothing I hear
but I'll hold out hope
for His Advent next year!

O Come, O Come Immanuel

All season this song has lingered in my head. It's not that annoying feeling you get when you get part of some jingle stuck in your head that you want out. It's like this song is trying to bore into my soul, to embed itself deep inside me with it's message. I've wondered why we sing a song asking God to come during the season we celebrate the very fact that he came to live among us. Why this haunting melody when so many other Christmas and Advent songs are joyous and full of wonder and praise?

I think it is because the Church, the new Israel, still lives in captivity. Her only hope lies in the deliverance of Immanuel, not born as a human child, but coming again in the full glory of God. It is faith in the promise that he will return for his Church that allows us to rejoice even while we remain in exile.

Somehow this song, with all it's verses (which it's a shame aren't as well known), links the God of the Old Testament to the God of the New Testament, it links to Moses, to David, to Jesus.

My question is what are we expecting during this season of Advent? I don't know if I have an answer yet.

O come, O come, Emmanuel
And ransom captive Israel
That mourns in lonely exile here
Until the Son of God appear
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.

O come, Thou Day-star, come and cheer
Our spirits by Thine advent here
Disperse the gloomy clouds of night
And death's dark shadows put to flight.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.

O come, Thou Key of David, come,
And open wide our heavenly home;
Make safe the way that leads to Thee,
And close the path to misery.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.

O come to lead us Adonai,
Who to the tribes on height of Sinai
In ancient times did'st give the Law,
In cloud, and majesty and awe.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.

O come, Thou Rod of Jesse, free
Thine own from Satan's tyranny
From depths of Hell Thy people save
And give them victory o'er the grave
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.

Redemption

It's of of those "churchy" words. The ones that non-Christians rarely, if ever use. And Christians barely understand, at least not completely, and that's ok. It was a word, an idea, that was lacking at the church service I went to this morning (this is not a reflection on that particular church as much as it is on the Church). The cantata went further than most in sharing the fact that the Baby Jesus of Christmas is also the crucified Christ of Good Friday. Unfortunately they left it there. They shared nothing of the Resurrection. Maybe they took it for granted that their audience would know how they story ended (which is probably true). As Christians it is our job to, "tell the Truth, the whole Truth, so help us God." (hmmm maybe we should make that part of a discipleship oath).

To be honest I don't even know the full depth of Redemption, and God has had me hung up on this word for months, despite my best attempts to ignore it. It's a heavy word, a loaded word, a word that demands a response. What does it mean to redeem something? To buy it back seems so cold, so business like. To offer something in exchange, is still a bartering system. The Redemption of God is sooo much more than that. Yes Christ bought us back, yes he did that by exchanging his perfect life for ours. His redemption is not just about a ransom, its about restoration, even more than that it is about renovation. God takes us from our slavery to sin, and doesn't restore us simply to our original Edenic state, as creatures, but he instead makes us his children. That is Redemption God-style.

The thing about redemption though is that the more we understand it and absorb it, the more we realize we will never understand it. That it is more wonderful, deeper, and more intense than we can ever fathom. That is the redemption I am living for, and learning to live in.

Flying

What is it about flying
that turns our imagination so
why with every thought
do we dream of letting go

We write books of dragon riders
and fairies with iridescence wings
wizards on broomsticks
all wonderful, magical things

We create machines
to lift us from the earth
space shuttles and airplanes
all technical, science's worth

But that still doesn't answer why...
why that desire to be free
is embedded so deeply
in the heart of humanity

I believe it is because
gravity is our first chain
the most constant
for every living thing

So while all we do is dream
for flying to make us free
let's remember
It's God who makes us free.

Home?

All semester that one little 4-letter word has unnerved me. When people ask if I'm going home for (pick a holiday) I'm never quite sure what to say. Is home the place I grew up, San Antonio, to some yes, but now that I don't live in that house any more, it's awkward calling that home. Is home the place where I felt the safest? That would be NH (the people far more than the actual building). That was my sanctuary, and my support network, and my ministry for so much of who I am now. But I realize that NH won't be the same any more. Which is a good thing. I'm not the same person I was when I left in August (leaving the identity crisises alone). I've grown, a lot, in a lot of different areas. Is home where my family lives (especially my parents)? They moved to Missouri last Christmas, I've never spent more than Thanksgiving break at this house, in a city where I know only one other person (Mike from NH). Is home where I am currently living, the Asbury Community? I wouldn't have thought so before today. I try not to get attached to colleges cause I know i'm just there temporarily. But after crying when I left this morning (I've only been here a semester and I'll be back in a month). I'm rethinking that. Is home Heaven? Yes, but I hope it's awhile before I establish permenant residence there.

"Home is less about where you are living, and more about who you are loving." That was the piece of advice I gave one of my girls as she left for her first year of college. There is more truth to that than I realized at the time. In that case I am blessed infinitely because I have so many homes. I have so many people who love me, further proof of the grace of God upon my life. I may not have a ready answer when I'm asked where home is, but maybe that isn't such a bad thing after all.

A ride

Buckle up and hold on tight
it's going to be a long ride
through an even longer night

with twists and loops
to make you scream
they'll even turn your face green

raise your hands high
its all downhill
like some crazy thrill

it's not going to help
to cling to the bar
"please keep all hands and feet inside the car"

What's the name of this ride
that you got stuck on
well my friend, it's a little thing we call
LIFE!!

A Season of Hope

So I say, "My splendor is gone and all that I had hoped from the Lord."

I remember my affliction and my wandering,
the bitterness and the gall.
I well remember them,
and my soul is downcast within me.
Yet this I call to mind
and therefore I have hope:

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.

Lamentations 3:18-22

This passage at first glance seems incongruous to the whole season of Advent, which began yesterday. Yet here my daily quiet times had me reading the book of Lamentations, a book remembering the fall of Jerusalem, the burning of the temple, and the carrying off of the Jews into Exile. Everything that they had hoped from the Lord, the promises of his blessing are gone. Not much chance of hope.

The prophet Jeremiah says otherwise. He says despite all of the bad things that have happened there is still hope. He places his hope in God’s character, not in his actions. It is so easy to say “well God did this to me so he must be (fill in the blank).” Instead of looking at it this way, “God is loving (as Jeremiah did), even if he allowed this to happen.” It’s all a matter of perspective.

Which brings me to Advent. This is a season of hope, of believing in the promises of prophecy as they come true before your eyes, and more importantly in your heart. It is one thing to hear the promise “unto us a son is born, unto us a son is given (Isaiah 9:6).” It is another thing entirely to realize that promise is for you as an individual, this child that is born, is born for you, he is given to you for the salvation of your sins. This internalization of a promise does not however negate its promise for the larger community, it actually enhances it. If the Christ-child is born in my heart, if his life is lived out through my own, it allows others to see the hope of salvation, and to desire the promises for themselves.

Jeremiah places his hope in God’s character, we should do likewise. We should remember that God is always and forever a God of love and compassion. Jeremiah says that his compassions (note the plural) never fail. It was his love and compassion that motivated him to make the promises through the prophets, and his faithfulness to fulfill them in the gift of his precious son to us. That is a cause for great hope this season, and every season.